Okay, so I'm going to write an update about a fellow poster. Evan, you see, he has this really great skill of becoming obsessed with stuff. Advance Wars, Day of Defeat, Empires, a certain unmentionable bunny, the state of Arizona, and revolvers are all examples of some of his obsessions that I have personally seen him obsessing over, and this is only since the beginning of last semester!
Well, it seems, as of late, Evan has a new obsession. I'm going to show you a picture of the obsession, and let me just say, I've warned you (although chances are if this post is on the top of the page you've already seen it and gone 'What the hell is that thing?!"):
Crackychan. You might, again, be wondering, "OMGWTFISTHAT." I don't exactly know, either.
You see, apparently Evan hangs out on this really "great" messageboard called 4Chan. It's a really great place. If you want to see anime drawings of 5 year olds being gangbanged or something. 4Chan's userbase consists of essentially a bunch of SA rejects and anime fags. I'm sure there are decent people on there, but when you keep around image boards dedicated to drawings of underage porn and dickgirl porn, how great can something be?
Why does Evan hang out there? I really don't care to know. Out of sight, out of mind. All I know is that he's developed a recent infatuation with this "crackychan" character. This is really sad and so I decided I needed to post about it. He tells me "red noses are hot." Jesus christ, man, it looks like she either has chronic nosebleeds that she doesn't bother to clean up or that she has some skin disease that causes hardcore redness to appear whenever the skin is even slightly irritated.
I guess she could be painting it red, but I'd like to assume that she isn't doing that because then she's doing a terrible fucking job at doing something terribly fucking stupid.
That aside, why is Evan so obsessed? I mean, she's hated as a dumb camwhore bitch on 4chan, and if you're hated by 4channers (especially if you have a vagina) that is really saying something. Then, I remembered Evan is about 4 years behind everyone else on the internet. This is probably the first time Evan has experienced a girl ON THE INTERWEB!!!! who was willing to whore herself out for attention on a camera.
So, Evan, I'm here to let you know that there are other girls out there. You probably don't want some fucking girl who's posting on an anime imageboard, but that's just my opinion. Either way, she dresses in a fucking sailor scout uniform thing. Wow, hot, for real, you look so japanese and shit, keep reaching for that rainbow. And wow, is that enough fucking makeup on your face? Jesus christ, she would scare children, Evan. Children. Yet you see her and think that you immediately must masturbate. Do you realize that this conflicts with "good judgement."
Okay this rant is really going nowhere. I'm tired and there's no LOL punchline, this is pretty much just a "jesus christ Evan how could you become obsessed with that camwhore?"
If you're going to go for camwhores, might as well go for one that will address you and not the imageboard that she posts at.
Also, since I'm posting pictures, howabout this one, where she gets honest about her fucking nose:
Man okay, I wrote this thing in several segments, so I apologize for it not being really coherent or having much of a point.
But seriously, Evan, jesus christ, she's fucking ugly, okay. Terribly ugly and I hope you die for being able to be attracted to her.
(Also I think she has just a hint of semblance to a certain girl who stopped coming to a certain school, and this may explain a bit of the obsession)
P.S. I am apparently anne frank now.
P.P.S. Since old posts are finally falling off the front page, old posts are readable through the "Rants" section.
P.P.P.S. Jesus Christ Evan, Jesus Christ.
7 Comments:
hawt.
By frogboy, at 2/09/2005 10:54:03 PM
I won't defend 4chan because that place is a very sick place populated by morons, no argument there(It's like a trainwreck, horrifying but you want to watch, probably the same reason you look up shit like lemon party and goatse, also it's not like you can't find that same shit on 2chan and ffmlchan). I really don't know what draws me there, actually it was through you that I found out about it, but that's neither here nor there. Just to clarify though there are no lolikon imageboards there anymore. Anyway, She's cute... fucking shoot me for liking something other than asian. Yeah, cam whore, sailor outfit = "japanophile fag", bat ears = almost furry, caked on make up, bad teeth (although she's probably english)... yeah I know. I hate all that, but it works. i don't give a shit, I think she's cute and also I don't think she resembles THAT person. (although are you saying she's ugly too?)
eh...
By frogboy, at 2/09/2005 11:22:16 PM
yeah okay well I just jumped over to 4chan and look:
http://www.assgirl.org/liar.jpgwow two loli boards appear to be on the main fucking page. Unless you click on them and it goes "LOL PEDO PRANKED" or something, I dunno, I'm sure as hell not gonna click on them. And if you know that it says that you've obviously clicked.
I don't care if you see her as hot, I'm telling you: She's grim. Okay, you can choose to like grim chicks, I don't really care, but that's it okay, this is Huntertown.
OMG I POSSIBLY INSULTED YOUR ORIGINAL FUCKING OBSESSION JEEZE. No, I'm not calling her ugly too, although I never saw what was so obsessable about her.
By piro, at 2/10/2005 09:20:07 AM
lol I posted a serious reply but then it didn't show up so check it out, instead, I'm just gonna call you a liar:
http://www.assgirl.org/liar.jpg
By piro, at 2/10/2005 09:24:58 AM
I didn't realize that we've already accumulated a bunch of posts on the site already. retrospect. I don't think she's ugly, but everything except her flesh has to go.
By bee, at 2/10/2005 10:07:17 AM
Today morning my parents had a call. The girl you know as "Cracky-chan' wanted to kill herself and is in hospital now. She will die in one or two days.
FUCK YOU ALL for this I knew her FOR REAL over years. I was never so sad in my life before. Guys do you not realise that this is for real? Thats not fun in the realtity a REAL person DIE because of 4chan.
I hope so all 4chan assholes burn in hell for ever. Thank you 4chan for killing one of my friends. I think this will bring consequences to 4chan.
This is my wish.
By Anonymous, at 9/29/2006 06:11:33 AM
Cracky's death came at such a young age. It is so sad how she suffered so much those last two days. Her young body writhed in agony as the screams of nearly-unbearable pain defied the morphine drip.
Onlookers exhaled a communal sigh of relief when she breathed her last and her body went limp.
Cracky's wants were met regarding her final arrangements. Her friends gathered and solemnly carved and cooked her mortal remains and fed them to the stray possums in the neighborhood.
Now, Cracky will live on, forever, in our hearts and in today's and future generations of possums as her molecules are incorporated into their living tissues.
By Anonymous, at 3/05/2007 11:59:10 AM
